Well this is a first.....

LOL! I'm so proud of myself. Pree just left and for once I'm not completely smitten with him. Yay!!! I think I'm finally waking up. I don't think there has ever been a time that I've seen him and didn't start glowing afterwards. Don't get me wrong....I'm in a really good mood but its not because of him. He came over...we got physical...We talked and then he left. No discussions about us (this would be the usual), no me wanting to date him and being upset that he's not ready to settle down, most importantly....No me crying about feeling stupid for falling for him again. I think I'm finally okay with the situation. I know it will never go anywhere and I know that he's not what I really want. Its been more of an infatuation with him. Physically...He's the best I've ever had. He was the one I experienced many of my "firsts" with so I guess its natural. Its taken me awhile to differentiate love from sex. I thought because I was always on a complete high after we hooked up that meant I really liked him. WRONG!!! It just meant I finally had some really good sex. Ha! Ha! I'm so glad I see that now. It was really starting to mess with my head. My only problem now.....I compare everyone to him. Its really stupid and I'm probably going to miss out on a really good guy but its just something I can't stop doing. DARN IT! That's my next obstacle to get over. Time for bed. Boy do I feel better. NITE!