Mr 4

Had a pretty nice weekend. Spent the majority of my time just catching up with things like emails, bills, and work but it was nice to have a little break for once. Kristal was in town so we ended up all going to Trudys Friday night for drinks. I hadn't laughed that hard in so long. We were cracking up the whole night reminiscing about all the mischief we seemed to get into during high school. Man, just realized how old I've gotten. Ouch!
Anyways....Saturday night I spent the beginning portion hanging out with Mr 4. Mr 4 is a guy I actually started talking to on myspace sometime last year. I know I know...LAME. Internet dating? Well not exactly. We just sent messages here and there but never actually met. In fact I really didn't think we ever would. But for some reason we finally managed to hook up Saturday and I'm really happy we did. First impressions........he was VERY attractive. But that was really it. I didn't feel any kind of connection. Alot of it was me being so nervous. I didn't talk much and could barely keep eye contact. I hate when I get that way. He seemed a little sarcastic, like me, which was a plus and we started a little ranking game which explains why he is called Mr 4, but other than that.....I wasn't really feeling him. For some reason though the next day he was still on my mind. Hmmm......why is that I wondered. Must be some reason why the thought of him put a smile on my face and I was bound and determined to find out what it was. So.......I invited him over again the next night. This time, as soon as I saw him, there was an immediate attraction. Wow! Very nice guy and fine as hell. LOL! We watched some of a movie that was on and then ended up playing spades with Brittany & Will. His personality came out more and more throughout the night and I really found myself wanting him more and more. =) We finished up the game with Will & Britt kicking our ass and then decided to lay down for a bit. We just talked and shared a few kisses here and there. It was nice to just have that and not have to keep pushing wandering hands off me. Glad I gave it a second go around b/c I would have missed out on a really good guy. Not sure where his head is right now as far as how he feels about me but I'm just enjoying it for the moment. Maybe it will go somewhere....maybe it won't. It's all very new. One thing I can say.....Mr 4 was definitely worth meeting!

Philly

Mmmmk so Candice finally found out once again that Sam and I were talking. I knew it was going to happen sooner or later because he wasn't doing a very good job of covering his tracks. He stopped calling me private and then didn't delete my text messages. Anyways....now the crazy female has taken it to the extreme and deleted his myspace & blackplanet. And possibly turned off his phone. Still not sure if she had it disconnected or if he just hasn't paid his bill. Either way she's really trying to push him into not speaking to me. It's actually kinda sad. She thinks by monitoring everything that its going to make him stop. I feel sorry for her because that's not going to do anything. He's Sam and he'll always be Sam. Getting married, changing his email and websites, turning off his phone....none of these things will fix their situation. She has to learn to trust him without giving him all of these limitations. I tried explaining that to Sam but he's so scared of losing her that he just follows whatever rules she gives him. The worst part about it. She's only doing this b/c I truly believe she's intimidated by me. Don't think I'm being cocky, when I say that. I mean b/c she thinks that if I stay in Sam's life he'll end up getting back with me and that's so not the case. Him and I are friends and will always be just friends. Sure we had our moments but with him gone and watching what all he's put her through well....I don't want to end up like her. So as much as I love him, a friendship is all I look for from him. The only problem....getting her to realize it. Through everything I'm kinda numb when it comes to my feelings about her. One minute I feel bad for her having to go through everything and the next I can't stand her because I feel like through all of our drama and the whole situation she used me. I didn't feel this way until the day she told me I could no longer speak to Sam. I was like, "What the fuck?" This is the same woman who told me she appreciated everything I did for Sam and for all the "truths" I gave her about the situation. She knew Sam and I were good friends and I thought that would be enough to ease her own insecurities but I was wrong. Now I'm stuck in the position of deciding whether to leave Sam alone or not. I mean him and I haven't talked in two weeks so I guess a normal person would think there is no decision to be made. But, you don't know Sam. I know he will end up contacting me sooner or later and we'll be right back to how we were just a few weeks ago. Talking daily and missing the times we shared together. So....do I turn off the reminder we set on our phones so we'll think about each other daily, do I throw the hat and dog tags away that are still sitting on my tv from when he left them, do I give up on my plans to visit sometime this year???? Not sure yet. Part of me wants to and part of me thinks that then I'm giving up on our friendship and I truly don't think he has yet, so why should I? For the moment I'm just going to give him & her the space they need and let God figure out what's best for me.

Friday

Yay it's Friday! Thank goodness. I had another crazy week. I keep thinking things are going to slow down but no such luck. Not really looking forward to the weekend. I have to work the whole time at my second job. No fun. I really need the money though so I guess its worth it. Kristal comes to town tonight so maybe her and I will end up getting together. I really need a drink. Will it be Baby A's, Pappasitos, or Trudy's????? Hmmm.....help me pick guys. Other than that no major plans. My whole family is going down to the valley so I will be house sitting or should I say pet sitting for them up north. I know, I know...sounds like so much fun, right? LOL! Not! Mmmmk...so really don't have much else to say today. I had a long blog going earlier and deleted it on accident. Not very happy about that. Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend.

Just My Luck

New day, new week, new......EVERYTHING. Well I had a very interesting week, last week. It was one thing after another it seems like. Monday started with me coming home to find my electricity had been turned off. Did someone forget to pay the bill? Yes...well sorta. I paid it late and apparently my payment had not showed up on my account before they turned it off. So I immediately had to pack up my groceries and head to my mom's house so they didn't go bad. This wasn't so bad b/c my grandmother had just come to town so I was at least getting to see here. After repeating the story 50 times to everyone and a few laughs I thought the night hadn't turned out so bad. Why did I think this? A few hours later I received a phone call from Travis County Correctional Center and who was on the other end of the phone???? Justin! Yup...my brother landed himself in jail. I will not get into the charges because he has not met with the judge yet but be looking out for a future blog explaining the situation. So I spent the remainder of my night and the following day dealing with that drama. He was finally released late Tuesday night so I still looked forward to the 4th (Wednesday). I woke up early Wednesday excited for all the events of the day. BBQ, family over, possible parties to attend, and lots of fireworks. As I stepped outside my plans soon had to change. It was pouring outside. BLAH! I could not believe it. Could I not have one good day this week? Well outdoor activities were cancelled and then my aunt ended up not coming to Austin with her family. So we spent the rest of the afternoon playing spades with my family and didn't bother to head downtown for the fireworks. I headed home around 9pm and on my way so all sorts of fireworks going off. I was so mad that we decided not to go downtown b/c they had actually decided to continue on with the show b/c it briefly stopped raining. DARN! It did not seem like this week was ever going to get better. So Thursday wasn't too bad. Had a decent day at work, then headed home to have a relaxing night alone only to come home and find my kitchen flooded. That's right! Flooded! A pipe busted above my ceiling in my kitchen and water was EVERYWHERE. They tried to stop it but it continued to leak until the next day when they could get someone else to come out and fix it. Boy how I longed for the weekend. Surely it had to be better than my week.......

And it was. With everything that had happened all I could do was laugh. It was actually pretty funny when I looked back on it all. Maybe not at the time but now it seemed hilarious. Just my luck. =) All I could do was think, "Did it kill me?" "No." "Did it harm me in any way?" "No." "Did I learn from it. " "Some what." Then it was all good. I have a wonderful family and great friends and the ability to not let things get me down. I'd say my life is pretty darn great. I spent the entire weekend doing my own thing. Nothing major. Just little things I had been putting off. I woke up this morning feeling so much better. A sense of accomplishment. Nice feeling. I think I'll try to keep this up. Started the diet again today and the exercise program. Also working on a few other things that I'll catch you up on later. So...onto a new week. Happy Monday!

Wanna know why I'm in such a good mood????

Today has already started out great. I spoke to someone this morning that put the biggest smile on my face. Wanna know who it is? If so, and your my friend on myspace you can view it on my blog there. If you're not my friend on myspace......you're probably not suppose to know who I'm talking about. Sucks for you. =) Have a good week everyone.